Clear the Colons!
by Kate Rados
In order to purge my brain from all the Macmillan/Amazon madness, I thought I would pick on something completely out of left field. Something minor; something harmless. Something that Andy Rooney would bitch about…
Like a passionate call to arms about a mundane pet peeve!!
I’m officially asking for a colon ban.
Don’t be coy. You know what I mean.
[Punchy Book Title] [COLON] [Incredibly Long Subtitle of What The Book's About, in Case the Reader Doesn't Get Our Pun]
The majority of titles on the NYTimes Non-Fiction Bestseller List follow this format. Yes, it’s helpful when you’re not sure what the book really covers, but it’s a little out of control and frankly predictable.
Examples:
Game Change: Obama and the Clintons, McCain and Palin, and the Race of a Lifetime
and holy hell:
By the way, Non-Fiction isn’t the only group being a little ridiculous. I’m looking at you [Fiction Title] [COLON] ["A Novel"].
and my favorite…
I, Sniper: A Bob Lee Swagger Novel (Bob Lee Swagger Novels)
Indeed, Bob has swagger. I say our book titles need a little linguistic strut as well.
Comments
HAHAHAHAHAHA! THANK YOU! It’s like, thanks for saving me the trouble of reading your book by telling me EVERYTHING that’s in there in your TITLE. Or alternately, your marketing department thanks you for saving them the trouble of having to market your book properly by attempting to market your own book through your title.
And yes, Whatever: A Novel, I KNOW you’re a novel. I’m in the Fiction section at the bookstore. Chances are, I’m buying a novel.
Sheesh!
Somehow, I feel like this is all Dave Eggers’ and McSweeney’s fault.
In the words of Oscar Wilde, “The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.” In this digital age it is important to associate an book/item with a search phrase so the item is more likely to be shown whenever anyone searches for that phrase. The colon is a tool (albeit and overused one) to incorporate easily a search enhancing phrase to the title’s metadata. It is ugly and clunky but can be quite important in impacting the sale of your book.
I do agree with you that with fiction in particular there is a surprising lack of creativity in creating this “search enhancing” phrase. Colon:A Novel is such a cop out. I would love to see a return to the more baroque titles of the 18th Century. The History of Tom Jones, a Foundling is quite descriptive but nothing compared to the naturally search optimized The Fortunes and Misfortunes of the Famous Moll Flanders, Etc. Who Was Born In Newgate, and During a Life of Continu’d Variety For Threescore Years, Besides Her Childhood, Was Twelve Year a Whore, Five Times a Wife [Whereof Once To Her Own Brother], Twelve Year a Thief, Eight Year a Transported Felon In Virginia, At Last Grew Rich, Liv’d Honest, and Died a Penitent. Written from her own Memorandums., but I don’t think anyone could beat The Life and Strange Surprizing Adventures of Robinson Crusoe of York, Mariner: Who lived Eight and Twenty Years, all alone in an un-inhabited Island on the coast of America, near the Mouth of the Great River of Oroonoque; Having been cast on Shore by Shipwreck, where-in all the Men perished but himself. With An Account how he was at last as strangely deliver’d by Pyrates. Written by Himself. Type The Great River of Oroonoque into Google and see what the first 5 listings are.
Ha! You know, I hadn’t thought to go that old-school, but it’s true. OK, so Dave Eggers & Co. aren’t to blame. For THIS one…
But still, I never understood those titles either! I mean, metadata or no, don’t tell me everything that happens in the book from the title! Nothing screams “spoiler alert required!” more that the full titles for Moll Flanders or Robinson Crusoe!
Can’t someone just assign keywords to books for searching without them being in the title?
HA! Jim, that Moll Flanders titles is epic and beautiful